[Find a crack to slot in]

Picking a person to be close to you a very tough time to field your thoughts in. The challenge is mostly not with you but with a host of your options available. One may not see that until they get to decide themselves in future to appreciate the care and diligence needed to budget for this exercise.

The other thing is to be clear in mind what you want out of the person who'll be in that position. It doesn't matter what role it is, they just have to meet certain standards for them to be there.

Once you gain real access into them, and they get to know what you want of them, to prep them for what's to come. It'll either be that you share a bit of self by bits or in the case of one who's been near you to dip right in and let them in on your inner workings of your person as a whole. The benefit of going for that near to you person being that you had self been with them and learning in parts who they are, and going in fully a lesser risk than with a total stranger. A familiar stranger a safe bet always.

It's important for the chosen to understand why them and where you position them so it becomes the regulator of your relationship. It must also be set out whatever that'll work against the arrangement of your relationship from the onset.

What kills the vibe of many an arrangement is space apart. At most the vacuum created communicates a certain point of where you are with the person, however the reasons. The many patterns in that setup gets used to and adapted to, and should there develop new ones, hard to be sure to view as trend or pattern. The challenge is what to do if there's a knock by someone availing self as a lead replacement. Before their quality the issue to tackle will be the intent, followed by their timing. Establish the crack they want to slot their self in, and you'll be in a better position to decide better what to do about the vacuum.

Ever been in a year gap with someone only to reunite and fill the void as if was yesterday? A bond can do that. Space apart a test by either of you testing your importance, or circumstances testing your impact on the other, or a plan by someone to open a crack for themselves. But whatever it is, a move too risky if you lapped your to come over.

In conclusion: given the regulation of your relationship, gender becomes a factor. How you relate to the same as you gender isn't as with the opposite, so then, what to do of your closeness? The principle is to say in honesty the state you find yourself in with them in the arrangement. Truth is, finding that crack to slot in doesn't apply to them alone but with you as well. The trick here is finding a mode to enable detachment after reaction or a build up of attachment if responded to.

Pity misfortune may be either party's failure to recognize importance of constructive criticism of the other's crept into the grey zone, thus resulting in a stay away. But if stick to your slot in the crack, the message will be loud and clear for that's how you show your intent in the arrangement. Find a crack to slot in...dp